FFS

Oh, I was so smug wasn't I? "Lalalala...Orange Wednesdays... lalala Sex and the City..."

I thought "oh, we'll be sensible, we'll go to the Odeon straight from work, buy our tickets then go for food. Simple. Easy. Bish bash bosh."

Except when we got to the Odeon at 6pm, it was already heaving with stupid, half-term, Orange-code-wielding teens and not only was the 7pm showing sold out, but the 8pm and 8.30pm showings were too.

NOT FAIR.

So now I am home, still none the wiser as to what happens in the movie. This is the THIRD time my plans to see it have fallen through.

Oh and Odeon Cinema Liverpool? Instead of having fifteen LCD screens which play the exact same loop of cola being sexily poured over ice in slow motion, why don't you put some actual information up there, like... oh I don't know... whether or not a film is sold out, so that good, innocent folk like me don't have to queue up for no frikkin' reason? Just a suggestion.

Here is an image which may or may not be from Sex and the City 2. I have no idea because I STILL HAVEN'T SEEN IT.

[source]

Top of the shops (part 1)

So I know the prices are going up at an alarming rate (oh hello cotton tee-shirt, what's that? £45 you say? Bye then."), and it is probably the number one retail haunt for every other person in the UK who wears clothes, but Topshop really is one of my favourite stores. Ok, maybe I should be more adventurous and shop more in vintage shops, or markets or charity shops or quirky boutiques or just make my clothes out of stuff I find lying around the house, like bin bags and sponges, but quite frankly I haven't got time for all that and anyway, you mad little spaniel, sponges are unhygienic. But, you see, with Topshop, there is always something in there that I want to buy. Always. I suppose this is partly because the one in Liverpool is now so frighteningly massive that there has to something amongst the endless number of jeans and tops and spangly pieces of nylon and jersey dresses and fancy shoes and embellished blazers and magical, whimsical, cheeky little trinkets that I want to by. It's just simple maths really. But you know what else is simple maths? That fact that I'm just a poor boy girl from a poor family and try as I might, I can't get the Topshop staff to give me stuff for free. So I only ever go in there if I've just been paid or there's a sale on.

Fortunately for me, Topshop just had a ma-HOO-sive sale so I managed to buy quite a few little lovelies without having to sell my little sister into slavery to be able to afford them. (not that I'd ever do that...)

Here's what I bought;

A really big ring!

These earrings that look like the wings of a fly! (In a nice way, not in a dirty, disease-spreading way)

This top - nude and purple and polka dots and a big bow all in one?! Yeah, I know, this is the best thing ever.

[NB Every time I post pictures of myself on here, I seem to have straightened my hair. I fear that I'm going to get into trouble with the trading standards people for false advertising. Honestly, I promise, I am a little curly girl most of the time!]

I also bought some purple tights, but you don't need to see a picture of them, they're just tights that are purple.

And all this cost me less than £20! Sale joy! Yesssss!

I realised that the eternal student inside me will always go straight to the sale section of a store first, because, well why wouldn't you? Sales are so frequent nowadays, that it only takes a few weeks for an item to go from full price to having a big red sticker on the label saying "50% off" (oh how I love those red circles). Some people hate sales, because they're messy and sometimes it's just lots of crap that nobody wanted, hence the reason why it now costs 20p, but if you have patience, you can find some marvellous stuff for a fraction of the price. And there really is nothing better than finding something you love and it only costing you a few quid.

So, with all this in mind, I thought I'd put together a guide of how to do the sales properly. Most of it's probably quite obvious, but hopefully some of it might come in useful.

The little curly girl's guide to surviving and succeeding in the sales.

Preparation.

Once you know you're going to the sales, you must make a few decisions beforehand;

- What will you wear? Once you get into full-scale sale madness, things get hot. And then you feel mighty silly for wearing your favourite ski suit don't you? So think comfortable, lightweight and also, easy to change in and out of quickly. If you're going to be trying loads of stuff on, you really don't need to be wearing clothes with lots of buttons or shoes with lots of laces etc. Also, it's worth wearing nice underwear, because firstly, the stuff you try on generally looks better if you're wearing a well-fitting bra and good pants and secondly, there is nothing more depressing than seeing yourself in the changing room mirror, which is unflattering at the best of times, wearing old, mismatching undies. We've all been there.

- How much are you going to spend? Yes, everything is much cheaper than usual, but it's still easy to get carried away. Set yourself a limit and unless you find something that is literally going to change your life forever, do not go over it.

- Is there something specific you want to buy? If you're looking to buy something in particular, for example a coat or a dress, it's worth looking on the website first, to see what's available, that way, you know exactly what you're looking for when you go in. I bought my current coat in the Oxford Street Topshop in January - the sale was INSANE but because I already knew what I wanted, it was much easier to find. Even if you're just going in for a browse, it can be a good idea to have a think beforehand about what you want/need in your wardrobe, otherwise, when you get there, it can be a bit overwhelming and you end up either buying stuff you've already got or leaving with nothing.

The scary part.

- So you've arrived at the sale. There is a sea of frantic women grabbing at garments while dead-eyed sales assistants rush around attempting to tidy. DON'T PANIC! Yes it's mad, yes it's messy, but there are wonders to be found. Be systematic. If there are lots of rails, start at one end and work your way through. The key to sale shopping is patience. If you look properly, you will find something fab. If you rush in, randomly grab stuff from the rails and get frustrated, you will find nothing. That's just how it works.

- When you do find something you like, DO NOT TRUST THE SIZE ON THE HANGER! Always check the label, because quite often, things are put onto the wrong hangers. There is nothing more irritating than getting into the changing rooms, or even worse, getting home, and finding that the lovely size 12 skinnies you found, are actually a size 6. (This is even worse when you don't realise that they're the wrong size until you've actually tried to put them on - "Oh God, how do they not fit? They're a 12! I can't get them past my thighs! Oh this is terrible, how can I be this fat? No... wait they're a size 6. For f*** sake..." and by that point you're so traumatised, you just want to go home and cry)

- Try stuff on. I know some people prefer to just buy things, try them on at home and then take them back if they don't fit, but that to me is more of a hassle than spending a bit of time in the changing room queue. Plus, it's easy to forget to return something and then you end up with a load of stuff you never wear, which is a waste of money. So try before you buy!

- If the shop sells everything, ie clothes, shoes and jewellery, go through the clothes first, try on what you like, then go back and look at the shoes and jewellery. You're not usually allowed to take accessories into the changing rooms because apparently, if alone in a cubicle with a pair of earrings, we all feel the urge to get a bit stealy. You may as well whittle down which clothes you want to buy from the massive pile you've probably accumulated, free up some arm space, then go and decide on accessories.

- Check the things you're going to buy for rips/stains etc. With so much stuff ending up on the floor during a sale, things can get damaged, so save yourself from the disappointment of getting home and finding that the white blazer you just bought has a footprint on the back. Also, if something does have a bit of damage, but it's not very noticeable or easily fixed, you can always ask if the manager will give you some more money off; I know someone who bought an H&M denim jacket for 50p once because it was covered in biro, she washed it and it was as good as new!

Behavioural check.

- Having worked in the Next sale several times when I was younger, experiencing first-hand the trauma of rabid, bargain-hungry women, I know just how soul-destroying it is to spend ages tidying a rail only to turn around and find someone carelessly dragging all the clothes out of it and chucking them about. Yes the sales are always untidy, but you don't have to contribute to the mess! If you drop something on the floor, pick it up! And if you see a sales assistant tidying a rail, don't stand next to her messing up all her tidying! Obviously you can look through the rails, that's what they're there for, you just don't have to act completely mental while you do so.

- Sale rails are quite narrowly packed together, so it can be easy to bump into people while you're trying to manoeuvre amongst them, but if you do, say sorry! And if someone bumps into you, don't get all irrationally angry, it was probably just an accident. Sales can be stressful, but honey, if you can't handle the heat, get out of Topshop - you're ruining it for the rest of us.

- If someone picks something up that you saw first, no matter how lovely it is, you can't fight with them. You just can't. Have a look around for the same garment and if you can't see it, keep an eye on the person - they may put it down again. Ultimately though, it's just a piece of clothing, don't act as though you're life depended on you owning a sequined playsuit because that's just tragic, isn't it?

"Don't sit under the apple tree with anyone else but me..."

Is it bad that it's ten past four on Sunday afternoon and I just climbed back into bed after doing nothing all day but watch Gilmore Girls and Marilyn Monroe films? Nah, I didn't think so either, I mean Sunday is the day of rest after all. And believe you me, I am feeling mighty rested!

It'd all be very relaxing except someone decided to buy their delinquent teenage offspring one of those stupid mini motorbike things and the little shit has been riding it up and down my street for the past hour. How much entertainment can you get from riding up and down one street over and over again?! He's not even going anywhere! I can literally hear the bike go past my house, down the road a bit, turn around and come back. I can't even begin to describe how irritating it is.

I hope the mini motorbike bursts into flames.

I don't necessarily want the rider to also burst into flames, just the motorbike, as that's what's making the noise. But if he were to get caught in the flames too, I can't say I'd feel that bad about it...

That is, of course, a terrible thing to say. I do not wish death by burning upon anyone. Honest.

Anyway, *deep healing breaths*, on Tuesday, Liv was in a fashion show for a vintage store in Liverpool called Flashback Boutique. I've never been particularly fussed on vintage stuff; I don't mind vintage accessories, such as scarves or belts but generally, I find a lot of vintage stores are just full of naff polyester dresses that are ill-fitting, stained or smell a bit questionable. However, I'm sure that, amongst all the random crap, there is quite often some hidden gems to be found. I just never have the patience to go rooting around for them.

Fortunately, Flashback Boutique made it easy for their customers, by picking out lots of the good stuff and showcasing it at their "Vintage Party". Unlike most fashion shows, where a collection is all based around some kind of theme, this show had several sections to it, each with a different theme, I guess this was because there was just so much stuff to show off but they still wanted there to be some kind of order to the show. So, for example, there was a section that was all nautical inspired and another section for evening wear.

Amongst the inevitable selection of cute printed tea dresses and batwing jumpers, there was also some more unusual pieces; after seeing the long double-breasted jackets worn as dresses below, I'm really desperate to get hold of one myself;

What I also really liked about the show was the hair and makeup. Sticking with the idea of everything being vintage, all the models wore "victory rolls" and lots of flicked out liquid eyeliner. Very 1940s pin-up, which I'm LOVING at the moment. I've been trying to recreate the rolls all weekend. It's so tricky! Especially the rolled-fringe like the one on the dark haired girl above. If anyone has any good tips or tricks, please let me know!

Photos by Martyn Randles.

There's also some lovely backstage shots by Katherine Oliver here

Liv wore four different outfits; sadly I can't find a photo of my favourite one, which was a navy and red spotted tea dress, but her favourite was this pink sequined jacket, which was one of the final looks in the show.

I've only got this really crappy image of the back of it, which I took on my phone, but as you can see it goes right down into a tailcoat type thing. Perhaps a gay ringmaster used to own it...

Also, while we were there, we both got snapped by a lady who works for a website called Fashion Finds. Basically, it's like a street style blog, but they provide links and details about where you can buy the items in the pictures. Nobody's ever asked to take my picture because they liked what I was wearing, so I was quite flattered. I was wearing a new maxi dress from New Look and the Big Ben earrings I mentioned in my earrings post last week - glad to see they're getting the appreciation they deserve!

I look a bit scared in the photo, because when the lady asked to take my picture, this big group of girls all stopped talking and just stared at me, so I felt really self-conscious. I'm not great at getting my photo taken at the best of times, so if there's a load of people watching it's bound to be a disaster! Silly I know, but I felt like they were all judging me!

Here's Liv looking a bit more relaxed than me.

If you come from Liverpool or are just interested in street style, mozy on over to Fashion Finds - it shows just how creative and diverse fashion in Liverpool has become. It's not ALL fake tan and blonde hair you know!

Flashback Boutique is based on Whitechapel in Liverpool city centre, but also has on online store, here.

Sophisti-muh-cated

I just got back from seeing the UK touring production of Little Shop of Horrors - it was wonderful and has filled me with a desire to get back on a stage and sing to my little heart's content... sadly I'm not sure when I'm going to get the chance to do that, so for now I'll have to just stick to belting out showtunes in the comfort of my bedroom and looking at this photograph of Audrey II from time to time...

"Feed me Seymooooooouuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrrrr"

Anyway, that's not really the point of this post; what I really wanted to tell you about was what I did on Wednesday.

What did you do on Wednesday? Huh? HUH?!

Well kiddies, on Wednesday evening, I went to my very first fashion show! I know! Exciting right? Well, exciting for me because I've never been to one and (due to my friend being very well connected) we were treated as VIPs and I thought maybe this could be quite a good opportunity for me to meet some fashiony people and do some networking!

The show was for House of Suga's S/S 2010, they're a new brand from Liverpool, designed by four local girls. It was held in the Anglican Cathedral, which is a breath-takingly beautiful, massive old building with a huge aisle that served as a catwalk and stained glass windows all around. When we arrived we were treated to free wine and lovely, lovely canapes (I'll be honest, I pretty much gorged myself on smoked salmon blinis - the wonderful thing about fashion parties is that nobody actually eats the food; fortunately, my friend and I weren't interested in fitting in with the fashion crowd, and quite frankly, we were bloody hungry!).

It got even better when I realised that, being VIPs, we'd be sitting on the front row for the show itself and that we would be getting GOODIE BAGS!

I tried to be cool about the freebies, I really did. I figured that a seasoned fashion show go-er probably wouldn't nose dive into a goodie bag like a three year old faced with a pile of bubble wrap and cardboard boxes on Christmas Day. However, my friend (for the sake of anonymity, we'll call her Sheniqua) had told me that the goodie bags would be filled with gifts from Harrods, (God only knows why I believed her...) so I did get a bit over-excited.

Contents as follows - lots of those mini perfume samples they give you in John Lewis when you buy something from a makeup counter (including Viktor & Rolf's Flowerbomb, which I think smells a lot like Angel by Thierry Mugler...), some random fliers about local Liverpool beauticians etc, a magnetic backgammon set by Dunhill which was lovely but, well...why?! and some weird tasting chocolate buttons and chocolate Lambananas -

This is a chocolate Lambanana - modelled on the Super Lambanana, which is a stupid sculpture in Liverpool, that everyone, apart from me, loves. Basically, imagine the above, but bright yellow and about the size of a rhinoceros - it's shit.

So the goodie bags weren't exactly filled with the stuff of dreams, but a freebie's a freebie in my book, and those mini perfumes are really useful for when you're travelling and don't want to take a massive bottle of perfume with you. As I already said, I don't know why I believed Sheniqua's ramblings about Harrods - she had also told me that all the guests would be wearing floor length gowns and tuxedos - fortunately I'd had the foresight to check and found out that this really was not, in any possible way, the case. Basically, Sheniqua's mental.

You may, at this point, be wondering why I am rambling on about goodie bags and chocolate mutant sheep when this is a fashion blog and I was at a fashion show - what about the clothes?!

Well, I don't have a lot to say about the clothes because they weren't really to my tastes at all. Think Miss Sixty and River Island - very bright colours, lots of sequins and patterns - a mixture of clubwear and beachwear for the very daring or very attention seeking. I wasn't massively impressed, but at the same time, this was their first show, and they had also been faced with the major setback of some of their garments not being delivered to the venue, meaning that they had to drop several models and didn't get to show all of their designs.

However, if you're going to put on a fashion show in the Anglican Cathedral and make a big old song and dance about it, and have loads of press there, well, you should probably bring the goods to back it up and in my eyes, what it all came down to was that House of Suga seemed a bit out of their depth.

I just don't think they were ready for such a big event - some of the designs looked more like mock-ups than actual finished pieces and a lot of their models were awkward and had horrendous walks; I'm pretty sure that Miss Jay Alexander would have had a nervous breakdown. Hopefully, with a bit more time and experience, the House of Suga brand will grow into something notable and exciting; it's always nice to see something new come out of Liverpool, but for the moment, no number of smoked salmon canapes and mini perfumes could distract from the fact that they've got a long way to go yet.

Things

Something wonderful happened yesterday. I went into town looking to get a few bits and bobs from Boots (because I pretty much always need something from Boots) and to go into New Look because this month's Cosmo had a 20% off voucher in it and I'm a sucker for a bargain. Now I wasn't expecting anything great to happen; it was just another ordinary Saturday in Liverpool - girls were out and about with their heads full of velcro rollers (seriously, they do that here), scallies were lurking outside McDonalds and blinged up babies reclined in their pushchairs (I actually saw a pushchair lined with fake fur yesterday, no lie) but this day was to become a day of glory...

Aaaanyway, I went to Boots and New Look, bought some eyeshadows and conditioner and a long tee-shirt and a bunch of necklaces and then decided, because apparently I hadn't spent enough money already and because the window display was enticing me, to go to H&M. Now I've come to realise that I am basically a walking advert for H&M, it's very rare that I'll go in there and not buy anything, but yesterday nothing really called out to me. I picked up a pair of very blue jeans but then put them back again because I realised I'd look like a twat in them. Then, suddenly, from above, it appeared, like a beautiful leather bird of paradise; magical and overwhelming, the JACKET.

Oh it's just... there aren't enough words. Let's take a minute to compose ourselves shall we?

Thirty five of your English pounds and worth every single one of them, thank you very much.

Now I know what some people (ie the stupid ones) might be thinking - "a leather jacket? Really? It's Spring - it'll be Summer soon - will you wear it?"

Well I have two things to say to you, firstly, it's cropped, so it's perfect for Spring/Summer. And secondly, I live in England. Even when it's hot, it's still cold. Judging by last Summer, I'll probably need a bloody cagoule, never mind a leather jacket.

So I was the happiest of all the people in town yesterday, I guarantee it. So happy in fact, that I was momentarily blinded by sheer joy and literally went mental in HMV because there was a sale on and whenever there's a sale on I panic and think "Oh my God 4 DVDs for £20 - I should buy all the DVDs, ALL THE DVDs!!!"

You see, I've got this image of me in the future, where I'm rich and have a big house, and in the big house there is (as well as a pool boy with an ass that won't quit) a massive DVD library, which I've built up over the years and has every single film and tv series imaginable. Of course what I always fail to think of is that, by the time I'm a proper grown up with a big house, DVDs will probably have become obsolete and we'll all be watching films by having some kind of chip implanted into our brains that allows us to watch whatever film we want when we close our eyes... anyway, I digress. So I bought Madagascar, Fight Club, the 28 Days/Weeks Later boxset and Atonement, which I've not seen before and watched last night. Bloody hell it was depressing, but their silly posh accents made me chuckle and James McAvoy is beautiful in a "is he beautiful? No, not really...and yet he is..." kind of way, so I still liked it.

But back to the jacket. I had a conversation with my friend fairly recently about how I feel that I'm just not very fabulous anymore. Now please don't read this as me being a big vain loser, because, while I may be those things, I don't mean it like that. It's just that I used to take risks with fashion and wear whatever I wanted and not care; my first year at uni I wore the most ridiculous ensembles, but they were eye-catching and interesting and people said things like "I love that whole Africana vibe you've got going there" and "wow, you look like a model"...I'm coming off as vain again aren't I? Well I don't mean to, honestly, I'm just trying to make a point. You see the thing is, I got lazy, and I spent a lot of time being skint and I just kind of forgot how to shop for fun things. Whenever I had money for shopping, I'd buy the things I could afford rather than the things I loved, and while those things were still cool and pretty and fashionable, they were very rarely *FABULOUS* and I found myself falling into a bit of a style rut. Cue the violins... oh dear...

Well, anyway, the point I'm making is that this style rut is officially over! I can't blame it on not having money anymore because I'm now in a better money situation, which means I'm allowed to shop and buy fabulous things, such as the JACKET! So I'm making a vow to make more of an effort with my outfits and take risks again! RISKS! Starting right now with ensembles such as these... (when I say 'right now' I don't really mean that because it's night time and I'm in my pyjamas, but, you know, the next time I go out)

Jacket - H&M, Skirt - H&M (see? I should have shares in the place!)

I know, blurry, and you can't see my shoes, but my bedroom is incredibly small and it's very difficult to get a full length photo of yourself...

Shirt - H&M (seriously), Skirt - as before (so H&M then?), Shoes - Topshop

I'm actually really liking this whole "let's bare our midriffs like it's 1996" thing, but only with something high-waisted, obvs.

Having a non-curly day... Necklaces, worn as headband - New Look

Can I get away with this? Who cares!? RISKS!!!

And finally, remember the sunglasses I bought from (where else?) H&M last week? I didn't realise it at first, but look! They're two-toned! Which means they are awesome :)

Happy days.

The Prints and the Pauper.

It's Saturday night and I'm at home listening to my parents and their friends getting drunk downstairs. I know, I know - what kind of lame-ass 21 year old am I?! This is the first Saturday night I've had in ages where I've not been in work so really, I should be dancing like a lunatic somewhere to make up for all the nights out I've missed of late. But you know what? I'm tired ok? I've been busy doing all kinds of crazy things this week so just give it a rest and let me boring, yeah?

Anyway, one of my favourite people in the world came to visit me yesterday and apart from a minor mishap involving an exploding bottle of chilli sauce and my H&M oversized shirt/dress thing (which was washed to within an inch of its life when I got home), it was a lovely day. Being the good friend that I am, I showed her the joys of Liverpool shopping. Fortunately (or unfortunately, depending how you look at it) both of us were feeling thrifty so we didn't spend a great deal, but I did still manage to snap up some nifty little bits and pieces.

Owl brooch - £4.50 from an amazing vintage jewellery shop in Grand Central, Collection 2000 Glam Crystals eyeliner - £2.70 from Boots, dress - £14.99 from H&M and sunglasses £4.99 also H&M

The dress was really just something I was trying on, I'd actually intended to buy a different dress but it's such a lovely, "flippy" (as my mum called it) shape that I changed my mind. My sister (very sensibly) pointed out that it'd go well with a leather jacket so now I feel like I need a shrunken leather jacket, I think it's important for my personal well-being that I get one soon. The sunglasses were too good a bargain not to buy; I only ever wear bug-eye sunglasses coz I've got a massive head and other sunnies don't look right on me (aviators make me look like John Lennon for some reason).

Can anyone explain why, when I turn the flash off on my camera, the photos go really blurry? Why is that? Why? I was trying to take a photo without the flash so that the brooch and the eyeliner didn't go all reflecty but it just didn't happen. Harrumph. I am in love with the little owl though. The price label called it a "Tweet-twoo brooch" - how ca-yoot is that?!

If you were to take a little look-see into my wardrobe, the first thing you'd notice, as well as the disturbingly massive collection of knitwear I own, would probably be just how many of my clothes are covered in prints and patterns, obviously my new dress is a good example of this. My other most recent purchase, another dress, this time from French Connection via ASOS is also all about the pattern;

Dress - £24, French Connection (ASOS Sale)

Ignore my hair in the photo as best you can, I was between styles (not quite curly because I hadn't scrunched it after washing but not smooth enough to be straight - the Little Curly Girl's eternal dilemma...). Anyway, the dress was a kind of random impulse buy; I generally don't buy online because I'm never sure what size I am and can't be bothered with all the faff of returning things if they don't fit, but I figured since French Connection sizes are pretty consistent and a smock dress is basically a sack with sleeves, (a very nice sack, but a sack nonetheless) I'd take a risk. I bloody love it so it was a risk well-taken. It's very flouncy, and flounciness is pretty much something I always want in a dress, plus I don't usually wear long sleeves so it makes a good change. The drop-waisted shape and the dense black and white print really remind me of these two pieces from the Anna Sui Fall RTW show;

( photos from style.com)

So now I'm thinking I need a cameo brooch (back to the amazing vintage jewellery shop go I), a pair of fringed boots, some lacy tights and, of course, a crazy feathered hat. But then, don't we all need a crazy feathered hat?

Scouse style

This week's Sunday Times Style magazine has finally picked up on what I've been saying for years - Liverpool is a massive front-runner when it comes to fashion in the UK.

I remember noticing it when I was about 14 or 15. If you looked at what kids in other cities were wearing, it was usually stuff that we'd been sporting at least 6 months before. Going shopping in town on a Saturday afternoon took preparation and thought when I was a teenager, and continues to do so. Before GHDs were invented, regular hair-straighteners just didn’t do the job and several of my friends would literally put their hair onto an ironing board and iron it to the point of paper-thin straightness (no lie). Bronzer and fake tan were then, as now, extremely important, hence the general view that most Liverpool girls’ skin is an unnatural shade of orange or terracotta.

The biggest challenge though was dressing for a night out. I remember when I was 17, the big place to go to was Garlands and we’d all try to outdo one another with how ‘funky’ we could look. My favourite outfit from back then was a pair of cowboy boots, a lilac tutu, a brown embroidered sleeveless smock and a string of pearls. Honestly…

Now though, grooming and style has been taken to a whole new level. In a city where everyone just seems to focus on going out at the weekend, looking good has become an art of painstaking preparation and complexity. The girls are coiffed to within an inch of their lives. Volume is in, so hair is generally BIG, backcombed and hairsprayed into either solid, unbelievably tall quiffs or candyfloss-esque waves. The clothes are generally a selection of bright colours, ruffles and bows, all teetering on platform stiletto shoes. It is the standard opinion that you don’t go out in Liverpool wearing an outfit you’ve worn before. If some people go out every single week, this begs the question, where the hell do young people in this city get their money from?! (I don’t have an answer for that, sadly)

It’s the ‘WAG’ style that seems to be the generally accepted norm in Liverpool, with girls like Coleen Mcloughlin and Alex Curran being hailed as inspirational fashionistas. Of course what really appeals about these girls is that they are living the fantasy of all materialistic, self-obsessed teenagers everywhere – they have a seemingly limitless bank balance with which to shop. But when more and more little girls, on being asked what they want to be when they grow up, reply “footballer’s wife”, we should really be worried.

Sure these girls look good, of course they do, everything about them is fake – their tans, their hair, their nails, even their eyelashes! It’s easy to look good when all the work’s being done for you and you’re wearing expensive clothes. The ones I really admire in Liverpool, and who really do define it as a fashionable city are the ones who dare to be different and who have a genuine eye for style, who can take a plain dress from H&M or even a quirky vintage dress from one of the boutiques in Grand Central and make it look a million dollars. But with all that platinum blonde hair and orange skin all over the place, it’s easy to miss something a little more subtle…